The Beginning of the End.

Read this.

I know right? I'm just as scared as you. Charlton Heston tried to warn us, but those brainiacs think they're smarter than Moses. Robots controlled by monkeys? Really? What good can come from this? Feeding himself is just the tip of the iceberg. As soon as that mechanical arm gets a hold of a laser, it's over.

I guess I should start acclimating to our eventual primate overlords. Did the humans in Planet of the Apes have it that bad really?
No real cares (except being hunted by Apes), foraging for a living, coupling when they want to couple, not concerned about their appearance, you know: the good life. Refresh my memory, didn't the Apes give all those humans lobotomies? I don't recall for sure, but in preparation of our coming fall from grace, I've scheduled a lobotomy for next Wednesday. That should be fun.

Damn, dirty, robot controlling primates.

THIS IS NOT ME.

I am going to nip this one in the bud before rumors start flying around that I like Tigger. Sure, I have me a pair of Spider Man speedos. But I only use those when I volunteer at those bikini car washes.

Is this guy infringing on my likeness? I can sue him for that, no?

BTW, This is where I got the pic. After staring at the pic for a bit, click here.

Lincoln Towncar. 2003-'08

I am sad today. I just sold the only cool thing I owned. The piece of prestige that separated me from all of you. The one thing that let me live my gangsta life style.

My Lincoln Towncar. If you never got to ride in it, you missed out. That car rode like a cloud. I used to aim for potholes just for the gentle swaying motion that would result. The trunk was so big I could fit a whole family of bodies in it. The seats in it are more comfortable than your couch. My couches are direct descendants of the Towncar, and therefore, more comfortable than your couches too.

I am sad today.

I have proof!

Remember my post about the Burger King? Read this and have all doubts removed. It's about half way into the article, so show some patience, K?

just curious

Does anyone know if the new Incredible Hulk movie with Ed Norton is a do-over? It doesn't imply sequel in the previews and I haven't seen the one made not so long ago. I don't get it. Is this the way Hollywood is going? A costly commodity like the Hulk gets a high price movie made then it bombs. A couple years later, they get a do-over?

Is Billy Zane in it at least? How 'bout Shatner or Goldblum? I would love to see those guys in a movie together.

HolY CRAP!

One of my favorite TV shows of all time is now online! Granted, it's just the first season at this point, but I can only assume that more are on the way. "Which show is it?" you ask. Well let me tell you.

TWIN PEAKS

If you are too young to know what this is, you owe it to yourself to watch it. It was groundbreaking work. It would still hold it's own on TV today. You definitely need to watch a few episodes to get the hooks firmly planted in you, but once you do....

David Duchovny plays a cross dressing FBI agent in it.... around the same time that the X-Files was out.

Classic stuff. We'll revisit this in the future.

Say hi to Bob for me.

Short Posts.

I want to know: what do you think is the worst movie ever made?
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Just for fun.
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I like conversation, but I like to keep it specific. For example: How is thing?
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Do you think the world is going to end? Or are we just getting started?
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Do you believe in aliens? How about illegal aliens?

Is this the beginning of it all?

Is this where the current look of the Burger King came from? The Disco Era? Seriously? They really are cultivating an air of creepiness. I have to say that I am old enough to barely remember the feel of the ads and the characters involved. I also need to say that the new-ish campaign with the King is one of my favorite of all time. What do y'all think?

The Economy, soon to be rice based.

I was driving to the market the other day (see pic) to stock up on multiple 50 lb bags of rice. I heard there's going to be a shortage, and I want to have a stockpile. I don't really like rice, I just want it on hand for currency when the bottom drops out of the dollar. 

I have a feeling everything will soon have their value determined in grains of rice. The transition from cash to rice will be especially hard for the stock market and prostitutes.

I don't have any solid numbers, so I'm going to make some up. I "heard" that at least half of the population of the world relies on rice. If not for sustenance, then for bartering or fuel for their rice burners (whatever that means). I'm uncertain how many bags of rice it takes to get a goat right now, but soon it will be how many goats to get one bag of rice.

Brace yourselves.

(pic courtesy of faithful reader, Scotty B)

Walking is for Suckers II

I spent some time at the como zoo yesterday and I was reminded of this. I stand by this previous post whole heartedly. In fact, I saw a commercial a week or so ago that applied to my situation and meant to post about it. This is the perfect time to do so. To watch the commercial of one of the most amazing products ever, click here (sorry, no video embedding of this video allowed) and to see the company's website, click here.

Are you back? Good. Now that you've seen it, can you believe it?

I know what it's intended purpose is, but I would looooove to have one, wouldn't you? How much fun would it be to soup one up and start a basketball league? Or have obstacle track races? What would it take to re-fit my Monster Mini Van with a wheel system that works like that. That would be step one to my life long dream to build a life size transformer.

The mind boggles.

Blogging is easy. Life is hard.

Turns out my plan of a post a day isn't quite running smoothly. Life gets in the way a lot.

I swear, it's not that I'm running out of things to say. The day that happens is the day I die. I have plans. Plans for posts. I have posts for days. While my posts wait to be written, they multiply like rabbits on performance enhancing pills.

The thing I'm lacking the most is time. My arch nemesis. I have my days and nights so thoroughly booked that it's amazing I'm writing this post at all!

Stay tuned faithful readers. You will be rewarded.

Love you.